1. Avoid death by small stuff
It's the small things that stresses life. I admit I'm guilty of this. I let small things bother me. I let small things ruin my day. If you already have a habit to get stressed easily, then it'll require a huge effort to change this behavior.
I learn from my wise husband that he doesn't let small things bother him. He is so peaceful. Yesterday we were driving in the road, and suddenly there's an ambulance making a left turn and cut immediately in front of us. My first reaction was to reach out to the horn, even though I wasn't the one who drove. But my husband prevented me and said,"Let it go. It's okay". I retorted back and said,"It's not okay, he should follow the rule, we almost got into an accident.". He calmed me down and said,"Just forget about it. We didn't get into an accident. And see? I even already forget about it."
The rest of the journey was pleasant. I let it go immediately. My younger version will keep hang on to it and let it dictate the rest of my days. But, this new habit, "let it go easily", it's actually works. I feel calmed and peaceful. What can I do anyway? The ambulance already way far ahead to the freeway. Plus the driver might be rushing trying to save another life by getting as fast as possible to get to the hospital.
Avoid death by small things. Don't make it your problem if it's not your problem. Like Elsa sang, "Let it go."
2. Keep saying no
Warren Buffet once said :
I ended up writing a separate blogpost for this. For further details, read it here.
3. Don't let your future controls your present.
Aka "Don't Worry, Be Happy". As Bobby McFerrin sang in that song, we shouldn't be worry for things that we can't control. Future for example. There's only few things that we can control, but we cannot possibly oversee every aspect.
I'm not saying that you should not planning your future. You do have to take necessary steps to build up your dream lives. You should have a goal and realistic plans to achieve it. I'm just saying that you should not be worry about it. If you let your future thoughts clouding your present too much, you won't have a present to enjoy.
I myself was guilty (again!). Sometimes I overanalyze my future. I obsessed with perfecting it, that I forget to enjoy the present. I spent hours planning this and that, and sometimes it ended up not happening anyway.
It's like a lottery wish. You ever heard that question,"What would you do if you win a million dollar?" You start saying, oh I'm going to pay this debt and that debt. I would buy this and that. I would help this person and that person. I'm going to travel all around the world. I would save half and invest half. I would do bla bla bla and the list go on and on and on. Just like Samir and Michael Bolton from Office Space did.
Well, it was a nice wish, but will it come true? That's why the question is in the "IF" format, and not "WHEN".
Don't be too consumed with all futuristic things. Set a goal, create a systemic plan, and do it. Just do it, but don't worry about it. Make adjustment to your plan if necessary and keep moving on. Don't get distracted with flashy little things here and there. And in the same time, enjoy the present. Enjoy the ride.
If your goal is so high above there that it seems you're in the bottom of the well, then be flexible. Don't set up goal so unrealistic that you ruin your present. That's why don't let your future control your present. You control your fate, not the other way around. Just don't worry, be happy.
Those are 3 things that I will tell my 42 & 62 year old self to do. Better yet, why wait that long. Just do it now. Let it go, no, and don't worry! :)
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