Work vs Retirement

Lately, I kept hearing people want to retire. All talks about retirement. Retire early, retire young. Or just simply retired. I asked some of them. Most of them said that they want to retire so they don't have to go to work. So they can have freedom for what they want to do in their free time. So they no longer work the work they hate. 

Isn't that the right reason to retire though?

To retire because they hate working? To retire so they can do whatever they want? To retire so they can go vacation all the time, sit at home and binge watch Netflix and Hulu all day? To go shopping all day in the mall? To dine in restaurants every night and don't have to cook?

One of my friend asked me just few days ago, when I want to retire? And I ask myself the same question. When do I want to retire? When my asset is at certain number? When my age at certain number?

Since I love working, I told her, I probably would never retire!

Even after my official retirement at 65 (maybe, we'll see), I would like to find a part time work somewhere so I can still be active and be involved in social activities. I can volunteer that's true, but it's no fun to volunteer all the time. It's no fun to play golf all the time. It's no fun to dine lobster every night. At some point, it'll be more challenging to have real hurdle in life. And looks like work is the hurdle of being free.

So now I come to this thinking. We should not want to retire because we hate our work. If that's the case, we should find the work we love. The field we can thrive. And if we can't find the work we love, then love the work we have. Love what we have. Many people would want to trade in our shoes to have the job we currently have right now!

I changed my mindset. Instead of hating work, I am loving work now. I feel accomplished. I feel fulfilled with working hard with my hands, my brain, and my everything. I feel contributing. And because of that, I feel content and happy with life.

You know what they say, find the job you love and you'll never work for the rest of your live. That is so very true! I feel amazing every time I go to work. I get to dressed up, put my make up on, put my best face forward, and drive to the office I love. Then I get to meet the co-workers and boss I love working with. I said love, not like. So there will be days that you just want to strangle them, but in the end of the day you still love them. Then when the bank open (I work in a bank), I get to meet the customers, and I love all of them!!!

I think that throughout my 20 years experience in the workforce, I always love my job and the companies I work for, including all the people I associated with. Each of them are unique and different. And I know this is not forever. Meaning at certain point in my life, I will stop working with them and move on to my next stage in life.

I learn the key of happiness is not to wait for the next chapter in our life to appear. Not to wait until we finish working and then be happy. Most of us work from 9 to 5, and the entrepreneurs even work 24/7, so if you wait to be happy after you finish your work, then practically you never will be happy! You spend a third of your waking hours at workplace, that is a big chunk of your day! 33%! So why don't we aim to be happy now that we are still fit enough to work, still have energy to produce, and to contribute to our society?

I'm not going to wait for my retirement days to be happy. I am happy now during my working days. I am content and happy. Whether it's work or retirement, I'll be happy nonetheless.

Well one thing for sure. While you're working, keep working on your retirement funds! You will need it one day. :)

The Art of Finding What's Right

In my previous blog post, The Secret of Happiness, I outlined that one of the critical point to be happy is to find what's right in our lives. The art of finding what's right is not to have ALL situations to be aligned perfectly. Far from that. But rather, to take notice of every single thing, no matter how small it is, that is going right in our lives.

It's simply a gratitude action. To be thankful for everything. Even though our circumstances seems to be in the bottom of the pit, but there must be something that is still good and worth to be praise of. This takes discipline and effort. It doesn't happen unconsciously.

It's a habit. When you cultivate gratitude, realize what is still going right in your life, to be thankful for everything that has been given to you, then eventually this habit will become your way of life. It's an auto pilot to think positive. It is a skill, so like any other skill, it can be practiced and honed in a daily basis.


Let's start with simple things:

1. Be thankful that we still have good health. Complete body organs. All still functioning.

2. Good family, wherever they are. That still love you and care for you.

3. Great friends. Accepting you for who you are. Lifting you up when you down. Cheer on your success.

4. Wonderful home sweet home. It could be your house, apartment, or even a temporary place like hotel and AirBnb. A place where you can sleep. Roof over your head.

5. We eat today. If you can still be able to eat each day, that means you are blessed. To not go to sleep hungry.

6. Good job or business. To be able to work and produce so we can support our lives. That is one blessing that sometimes people overlook by grumbling how difficult their job are. Never! Never take your job or business or income for granted. That is blessing from above and it should be respected.

7. The internet. Oh how wonderful is this thing! We can expand our knowledge and stay connected.

8. Mall and shops. Oh ya I am thankful for this "Retail Therapy". There's a joy in shopping. Hehe.

9. Clean air. The world is getting better. The experts are helping decreasing pollution.

10. You heard the birds singing in the the trees on the street you just walked by. Beautiful nature.

11. Tall trees all around. I lived in Washington, the evergreen state. So every time I drive, I always mesmerized on how green is the state I live in. I love the beauty. I love the serenity.

12. The fact that I'm only 40 years old. That means I still have good 25 years to work in the industry I love (bank and financial world), and possibly 40-50 more years to live the life I want. With people I choose and I love.

13. The struggles and challenges I face. It'll make me stronger and more resilient.

14. The safety of our world. I live in a very safe place, where I can sleep soundly at night and not worry about anything.

15. Green tea. Whenever I can sip a hot green tea, I count it a good day. Smooth and relaxing.

Find what's right in your life. Journal it. List every single thing. You'll soon realized that you are blessed beyond your imagination. That you may not have everything you want, but you have everything you need.

And that's what life is all about. Is to give thanks to every single opportunities. To want to have a happier life, one must always strive to be positive, and to find what's right. Practice this skill everyday, grain it into your daily habits, and eventually you'll have a greater happier life.

If You're Speaking, You're Not Listening

I received a very valuable advice today.

"If you're speaking, you're not listening."

That is so true. And that is so deep.

We live in a world where talking and giving opinion are a must-have skill to survive in this world. We tweet, post, and loudly voice out our truths. The longer we talk, the more we feel important. The world is so loud and noisy, that we forget to give people chance to voice out their feelings too.

So now I learn to be more quiet. To hush up. To just listen. To observe, watch, and listen. The expert says, the less we talk, the more we are in control in the conversation. He who speak more, lose the flow of the conversation.

Let's use the Pareto law. Instead of incessant talk, let's do more listening. 80% listening, 20% talking. The more we listen, the more we understand the context. The more we understand, the more we can relate to the situation. The more knowledge we gain. The more info we absorbed. And information aka knowledge is power. It's the 21st century version of power. Not money, not resources, but knowledge. And the only way we gain knowledge is by reading, listening, and absorbing the info.

So I want to be better at this thing.

80% listening, 20% talking.
80% reading, 20% writing.
80% observing, 20% in action.
80% learning, 20% teaching.
80% watching, 20% showing.

I want to listen, so I can talk better. If I just talk talk talk endlessly, what's the point? I'll lose my audience's interest and I learn nothing. I gain nothing. So it is for my own benefit if I listen more.

I'm listening. And I'm not speaking.

A Peaceful Life

I'm at the point of my life where I just want to live in a peaceful world.

Now don't get me wrong, there's no physical war in my time at the present (except the tension between trade war or the threat of North Korea or Russian missiles), but simply put, this is the most peaceful time the world has had, compared to different times of the past.

But I still want to attain peace in my own world. In my living space.

I no longer tolerate toxic people, abusive people, judgmental people to control my behavior. If they love me, they will accept me for who I am, for all of me. All the good and all the bad of me. It's not that I don't want to change to be better. But I admit I'm just a human, with my own set of strengths and weaknesses. Nobody is perfect.

But one thing for sure, I won't sacrifice my integrity. My character.  There are values and moral ethic that I hold high, and I won't compromise those. Integrity is strongly rooted deep in my life, and I will not trade them for any other fake winnings, like money or "happiness". So many of us desperately want to be "happy", that we throw away our code of conduct, and forget to do the right thing. Not me.

Peaceful is being content. Even being happy means being content. And although life has evolved into new beginnings that I've never imagined before, I must say that I am truly content with where my life has leading me now. I did work hard and I will continue to work hard to accomplish my dreams, but I also now am flexible with this thing called life.

A peaceful life is not a life without conflict. But rather, a life of controlling one's perception of how a conflict need to be resolved. The easiest thing to do is sometimes to just keep fighting until the end, so now I learn that letting go is one of the hardest thing to do actually! And letting go is supposed to be the easiest thing to do, and sometimes is the only right thing to do. So in order to maintain my peace, I'm learning to let go. Let go of the past. Let go of the dream. Let go and just let life evolve naturally.

I'm at peace where I also organized at my life, knows my priorities are, de-clutter, everything in it's own place. Yep, it's OCD. But that's my way to find peace in this chaotic world. It's not even the matter of control. I know there are only 1 or 2 thing I can control versus a million things that I have no control about. But peace is also knowing when to stop working on dead projects. Knowing when to to walk away from the unfixable chaos. Peace is letting people live their own lives, without our interference. Accepting reality and moving on.

The more I can accept the reality, the more peaceful I am. And it is a skill that I continue to learn.

Peace is finding my own balance without dependency to other people's acceptance on us. If they accept me, great! If not, that's fine too. I'll be peaceful either way. It's wisdom to be able to thinking at this level.

May you always find your peace and living a peaceful life, for the rest of your days.

WorkPlace: Bank of America (FSA)

Suatu hari yang cerah di bulan April 2018, ada 2 boss besar datang ke kantor cabang tempat aku bekerja di Bank of America. Mereka adalah Gioia McCarthy dan Scott McQuistan. Gioia itu adalah managing director untuk cabang retail banking, dan Scott adalah managing director untuk bidang investasi dengan Merrill Edge.

Scott dan aku sempet ngobrol2. Kita bicara tentang Merrill Edge, bagaimana banyak FSA (Financial Solutions Advisor) bisa reach target tiap bulan, walaupun tiap bulan target bulanannya banyak, dan bagaimana banyak support system yang bisa membuat seorang FSA menjadi sukses. Scott mendorong aku untuk mencoba untuk daftar untuk posisi ini. Aku sempet keder juga sih, soalnya ini kan bidang prestigius banget! Di akhir pembicaraan, Scott bilang dia akan bilang ke salah satu managernya, Taylor Welch, untuk kontek aku, untuk pembicaraan lebih mendalam lagi.

Beberapa minggu kemudian, aku dan Taylor ngobrol lewat telpon. Taylor bilang, untuk posisi ini, banyak sekali tesnya. Gak semudah itu untuk diterima. Pertama2 ada 2 tes komputer awal yang aku harus lalui. Setelah itu, ada beberapa interview dengan dia dan manajer2 lainnya. Lalu kalau lolos, aku dikasih kesempatan untuk belajar Series 7 dan Series 66 selama 90 hari. Dan harus lulus! Kalo gak lulus, ya balik lagi deh jadi banker. Setelah itu barulah training 8 minggu. Prosesnya panjang! Dan setelah konsultasi bolak balik sama dia, akhirnya aku mantepin diri deh untuk apply di posisi bergengsi ini!

Akhir bulan April, aku berhasil melalui 2 tes komputer yang rada2 susah itu! Dan setelah beberapa interview, dengan HR, dengan peer managernya Taylor, background test, dll, akhirnya aku diterima di posisi FSA ini! Rencananya aku akan mulai belajar Series 7 tanggal 6 Agustus 2018. Bittersweet harus pisah dengan kantor cabang Orchards, karena aku akan studi di kantor cabang Fishers Landing. Tapi agak seneng juga soalnya kan kerjaan baru!

Setelah 2 bulan menanti2 tanggal 6 Agustus 2018 tiba, akhirnya hari yang ditunggu-tunggu itu datang juga! Aku dikasih laptop dari kantor, lengkap sama kabel2nya segala! Hehehehe. Aku bakalan training sama temen banker dari Portland, namanya Tina Chan. Jadi kita berdua akan sama2 belajar bareng2. Yay! Aku studi di cabang Fisher Landing, jadi balik lagi kayak dulu waktu aku training jadi banker. Ketemu temen2 lama : Paula, Caitlin, Eva, Kellie, Vicky, Evan, Brent (dimana Brent ini yang akan jadi mentorku nantinya untuk posisi FSA). Dan juga ketemu temen baru, mortgage loan officer yang namanya Armand. Baik deh orangnya. Juga Relationship Banker baru yang namanya Howard. Juga teller baru yang namanya Barbara. Semuanya baik2 deh sama aku!

Terus, selama studi Series 7 dari bulan Agustus sampe 1 Oktober 2018, aku juga ketemu para trainerku dan rekan2 satu studiku : Thomas, Vitaliy, Jeff, Tessa, Alexa, Grace, Amit, Benjamin, Jamison, Sam, Hari, dll. Banyak seabrek2 temen2 baru deh! Tiap hari Senin, Rabu, dan Jumat, kita conference call jam 9 pagi. Terus banyak sekali kelasnya. Ada kelas conference classroom virtually, ada waktu kita belajar sendiri dari buku, ada waktu untuk belajar dari video. Pokoknya nggak ngebosenin. Materinya banyak, ada 10 bab kali! Dan sekali baca udah mesti hafal. Nah loh...

Gue ujian tanggal 2 Oktober 2018 untuk Series 7 ini... dan gue lulus!! Yay!!! Jadi sekarang waktunya untuk belajar Series 66 deh!

Series 66 juga ampir2 mirip modenya kayak Series 7. Cuma 5 bab, tapi ada satu bab yang dimana kita mesti hafal banget semua peraturan2nya. Conference callsnya tiap hari Selasa dan Kamis jam 9 pagi. Dan ini waktunya lebih singkat, cuma 1 bulan. Kalo Series 7 kan 2 bulan.

Gue ujian tanggal 2 November 2018 untuk Series 66 ini. Dan puji Tuhan gue lulus! Jadi sekarang gue resmi pegang 2 license investasi! Yayyyyy!

So next step : is the 8 weeks training deh! 7 minggu training di Vancouver, dan 1 minggu training di Chandler, Arizona. Seru gak tuh!!! Di 5 minggu pertama, kombinasi training gue adalah materi2 di komputer, web class training, videos, and conference calls as well. Juga shadow peer mentor gue yaitu Brent. Brent ini pro banget deh! Kayaknya enteng kalo liat dia kerja. Padahal kerjaannya dia kan banyak juga. Dan dia sabar sekali sama gua. Walaupun gue suka nanya2 pertanyaan "bodoh" kadang2.

Tanggal 10-14 Desember 2018, minggu ke-enam, 30 peserta termasuk gue dikirim ke Chandler, Arizona. Kita stay di hotel Hilton Phoenix Chandler. Hari pertama pas datang acara bebas. Jadi gue merdeka banget deh! Gue swim, shopping ke mall, makan malam di restaurant The Keg Steakhouse. Pokoknya haleluya dah! Hahahaa!!!

Hari kedua di sana, gue duduk satu meja sama : Daniel Caraveio, Jay Winston, Justin Oubre (used to in Chase, 34), Jordan Miller (BFA, 25). Cerita lengkapnya akan gue tulis di bawah ini. Ini adalah email yang gue kirim ke boss gue, Guadalupe, menceritakan tentang hari pertama di sini:

Hi Guadalupe,

I’d like to share my Day 1 in training yesterday! I’ve met with so many great and talented people! My trainers: Dipal Patel, Jason Wilson, Tricia Wilke, Scott Krueger, and Yulia (I forgot to ask her last name!). I also met our leaders as well : Matthew T Gellene (Managing Director; Consumer Banking & ME Div Exec), Christopher Allen (Director; Consumer Banking & ME Region Exec), and Jeffrey McIver (Vice President; Consumer Banking & ME Market Leader). I had the opportunity to take a photo with them, so I plan to upload and send it to you once I’m back in Washington!

After the training done, we had a chance to mingle and network during the Welcome Reception at the hotel. I’ve met Gabriel Rein, the Process Design Consultant who is part of the training developer. I’ve gained a lot of insights and confidence by talking with him! He reminded me to not rush things and not everything has to be done right in this second. And to not be shy to reach out for help. I’ve also met with David (unsure of his surname). I asked him what’s the common mistake a new hire usually done that hinder their performance.  David suggested to not take my feet off from the gas pedal. Keep pushing forward. I met  Lisa Martin, the Platform Development Manager. What a strong woman! She had rich experience in the finance world and we even shared common background in collection when she was managing and training collection managers in 1999! I truly learned a lot from her! I gained more insights from my other peers as well. There are 30 students here, and 3 more days to go, so I will have plenty of time to get to know each other better. And the food was great! Thank you Bofa for feeding me yesterday! Breakfast, lunch, and dinner!

I really fortunate to be in my shoe today. It’s Day 2, and I can’t wait what the trainers have in store for me! Hope you like my story, Guadalupe. I took your advice to network and I really gain so much from it. And no worries, it won’t stop at Day 1. This is just the beginning. J

Have a great day, Guadalupe! J

Hari ketiga, gue duduk sama: Daniel Caraveio (Austin, TX, Operations Charles Schwab), Benjamin Smits (Vietnamese UK, Morgan Stanley, 44), Amit Kuthiala (Bofa, Wamu/Chase, Credit Union BM, pursuing Master Degree Uni of WA), Jamison Faure (FCOM Bakersfield, CA). Peer: Monica Garcia (San Antonio, TX), David Rosado, Daniel Polite (pursuing bachelor degree finance, Oklahoma City, OK). Compliance Training. Trainers : Margaret Sanchez, Gregg Tyler.

Waktu malam, gue makan malem bareng2 Lisa Feng, Angelina Ornelas, Jamison Faure, Stephan, dan Jordan Miller di restoran enak yg namanya Rock Lobster. Gue makan salmon sama nasi putih. Yummy banget deh! Thanks ya Bofa udah traktir gue, hehehehe...

Hari keempat, bittersweet juga nih. Hari terakhir training di sini sampe jam 2 siang, udah gitu kita balik hotel untuk ambil koper2 kita. Gue pulang dengan pesawat American Airlines, dan kebetulan salah satu temen training gue, Sam Dietke, juga pulang barengan sama pesawat itu! Jadinya kita ngobrol2 deh!! :)

And now I'm back in Vancouver, Washington. Akan menyelesaikan 2 minggu berikut sebelum tanggal live gue 14 Jan 2019 di cabang baru : Hazel Dell. Mudah2an gue bisa mengulang sukses lagi deh seperti dulu waktu di Orchards dan dulu pas jadi banker di Indonesia! I am so excited for this new journey! :)

6 bulan kemudian...

Sekarang aku sudah kerja di lokasi Hazel Dell. Semua rekan-rekan kerjaku baik2 dan mudah diajak bekerja sama. Mereka pun semuanya menyenangkan! Masing-masing punya keunikannya sendiri-sendiri.

Dimulai dari kepala pimpinan cabang, Samantha. Dia ini pindahan dari Michigan. Orangnya baik, humoris, dan bijaksana. Gak mudah marah atau emosian. Gampang diajak bertukar pikiran. Rasanya damai deh bicara sama doi.

Asisten pimpinan cabang, namanya Amanda. Dia ini tadinya dari cabang Mount Talbert. Umurnya sama dengan aku! Cuma doi beda 3 bulan lebih tua, jadi kurang lebih sama kan. Suka makan sehat tuh! Tulisannya rapih sekali deh!  Sebelum Amanda datang, tadinya asisten pimpinan cabang kita namanya Dejainera, alias DJ. Orangnya baik sekali, dan selalu asik diajak ngomong pas makan siang. DJ juga suka nanya2 tentang bagaimana cara mengatur keuangan pribadi. Salut deh gue, orangnya mau belajar.

Team teller yang megang uang kas :
- Jessica : suka berburu dan suka merajut! Hebat ya?
- Izzy : doyan banget makan sushi. Kan ada nih restoran sushi persis di sebelah kantor kita!
- Angela : ibu anak empat ini bijak banget deh! Kadang suka geli sendiri dengerin cerita beliau mendidik anak2nya.
- James : dia ini pindahan dari cabang Fourth Plain. Suka makan sandwich, bikin sendiri!
- Onna : dia ini demen banget pesen sandwichnya Jimmy John. Gue juga suka sih. Habis enak!

Team bankernya:
- Tiare : cewek cantik berambut panjang ini udah tunangan loh! Nanti dia married tahun depan, 2020.
- Evan: cowok yang satu ini selain tampan, dia juga modis sekali dalam berbusana. Bener2 bankir teladan deh. Jaketnya selalu rapih tersetrika. Orangnya juga super professional, tapi asyik diajak tukar pikiran. Dia ini pindahan dari cabang Fisher's Landing.
- Madison: cewek asal Kansas ini demen bangeth minum Dutch Bros yang namanya Golden Eagle. Dia juga kerja part time loh di kasino, sebagai dealer. Seru juga ya?

Team partner:
- Kelli : petugas pinjaman hipotek, alias yang ngurus pinjaman rumah, sebelum dia dipindahkan ke cabang Battleground. Walaupun sudah umur 60, tapi nggak keliatan kayak umur 60 tuh. Malah kayak umur 45 aza! Orangnya asik diajak bercanda, tapi boleh juga pas diajak ngomong yang dalem2, misalnya soal kehidupan.
- Suky : cewek Asia umur tiga puluh ini bener2 supel dan suka banget sama Backstreet Boys. Dia ini yang ngantiin Kelli sebagai petugas pinjaman hipotek di cabang kami.
- Harvey: cowok Asia yang dulunya kerja di US Bank, sekarang bergabung sama kita sebagai bankir untuk usahawan alias rekening2x bisnis.

Kadang aku suka keder juga sama targetnya, tapi puji Tuhan deh masih dilengkapi. Seperti biasa, aku cuma bisa pasrah aza sama Tuhan. Do your best, God do the rest. Kan itu dulu mottonya. Sama sampe skarang. Hehehe.

Ya sampe segini dulu deh kisahku untuk babak kali ini. Kita lihat saja nanti kelanjutannya!

My 2019 New Years Resolution

It's that time of the year again, making a new year's resolution. So for 2019, here's mine:

Move Forward and Up.

Basically keep moving forward, and keep moving up. That means :
1. No guilt.
2. No regret.

In order for us to move forward, we can't afford to kept always being bugged with guilt and regret. Oh why I didn't do this. Oh why I don't say that. Oh why this and why that. We have to stop. Stop and think what's important ahead. What need to be done. So stop fussing all those wasteful regrets because it's not going to get you near where you need to be.

Another thing that is important to remember is to have no regret. People say : I wish I know this when I'm 22. Well, not true! When you 22, your knowledge is as best as you can be when you 22. You possibly cannot think like a 40 year old, because you're not there yet, you're just 22. So don't regret it. Don't say : If I know this when I'm 22, my life will be better. No it's not! Because if you did the best you can with what you've got when you're 22, then  your life is already better than the other 22 years old that don't have wisdom and experience like you. Or maybe the other 30 or 59 years old! Because wisdom come from experience, not age.

And don't let anyone guilting you into anything. Please. Seriously. Do not ever let anybody force you to eat that guilt plate. If you've done the best you did with what you have, then be content at that. Believe that you've made the right decision, the best decision with the circumstances you're facing. Don't let anyone influence you in such a way that you feel guilty of doing something (or not doing something). This is your life, not theirs. If they tried to guilt you, then you can say to them : why don't you do it yourself? Why don't you apply your own words to yourself? Walk the talk.

Move forward. And move up. No more time to move backwards and down. That time is over. Now it's the time to shine. Get up, go get it done, and progress ahead!

Happy New Year 2019!!!

Lost Weight Journey

A conversation with my friend regarding losing weight :

"Iya Na, semangat ya! Btw when i said 15 kg, it's not recently kok. I started to be committed to lose weight since July 2011, after my 1st trip to Canada. I was at 151 lbs. This morning I'm at 118 lbs. So I lost 33 lbs for the last 7 years. 33 lbs = 14.9 kg, ya dibulatkan aza ke 15 kilo ya? Hehehe

So as you can see. It's not an overnight process. It takes days, weeks, months, and years to get where I am now. It takes commitment, dedication, conscious effort, sacrifice, and definitely change. I change my diet. I strict it to :
- no butter
- no canola oil
- only EVOO (Extra Virgin Olive Oil)
- no second plate how hungry I am
- reduced my plate to 75%. Bahkan now I can reduced it to 50%
- exercise it's important, this is the field that I'm still lacking, but I do have an active lifestyle at least. So keep an active lifestyle : bersih2 rumah, jalan, choose stairs vs elevator, etc.
- track my weight in daily basis. Tracking it's important so you know how close you are to your goal.
- and definitely have a goal! You must have a written goal. If not, you just wish, but not really intend to. My goal was 125 lbs. And now I'm 118 lbs!" 

You can lose weight.

You just have to have a goal, stick to the plan, discipline yourself, and never quit.

It's a marathon, not a sprint.

Garden of Eden

As I sipping thru my hot cocoa, while soaking in the warm jacuzzi in my luxurious apartment complex, I think to myself, "This is life." On a cold winter day like this, I get a chance to enjoy the solitude of my own company in the the hot tub. I look at my surrounding. Beautiful lush garden with tall green trees all around. I look up and saw birds are flying and making some cute noises. I feel peace and serenity. I feel this is the Garden of Eden.

It's funny. From the world standard, I am less than what I was before. Previously, I had a big home with big beautiful family. Now that house is sold and the family had spread out their wings, I am just me,  myself, and I. Just a family of 1. And now I'm renting a 1 bedroom apartment for myself. So technically I'm "poorer". But the odds are, I felt so much "richer" than before.

Before, I don't have time to enjoy all these. But now I do! I have all the time in the world to stop and smell the roses. Something that I didn't have the luxury before due to obligations of life. But now, I can really relax, enjoy little things, and be grateful for every opportunity. This experience really open up my eyes. I now can get back to do my hobbies again, such as blogging and communicating with friends.

It is the outlook on life that will make you happier or not. It's not money. It's not things. It's not success. It's not fame. But how you perceived life will determine if you're going to be happy or not. In everything, you always have a choice to view it as a positive experience, or a negative one. You can always choose to do the right thing, or not. You always have the option.

When I'm done with my spa jacuzzi time, I was just chilling in the clubhouse. The apartment management had put together such a beautiful clubhouse for the resident to enjoy. I went to the fireplace, sipping my hot green tea (courtesy of the apartment management! Thank you!), and feeling the warmth embrace of the fire. Then I sit on the big couch in the living room, relaxing some Christmas music from the gigantic flat screen TV in the center of the clubhouse. How soft and comfortable to sofa was! Enjoying the Christmas decoration that is neatly put together. The pointsettias. The little this and that. How life is wonderful!

I feel that today I visited the Garden of Eden. Everything is so beautiful. Give me peace of mind.

Thank you, Lord.

I'd Rather

Once upon a time ago, my good friend in high school wrote this in our yearbook :

"I'd rather get a 9 with my own effort, rather than a 6 with cheating."

Funny quote, huh?

Well, first of all, of course you'll choose a 9 vs a 6! And of course you'll be prouder if with you get it with your own effort rather than cheating. That's why so many people usually put the phrase like this: "I'd rather get a 6 with my own effort rather than a 9 with cheating." Basically it's better to get things honestly and the right way, rather than with shortcuts, cheat, and deception.

But what I love about this quote, it's contains deeper meaning than that. It convey a message that you can get the best of both worlds. You can still get the result you want, with the correct way of doing things.

And that reminds me, another once upon a time ago, someone told me,"I'd rather have 1 or 2 true friends, rather than 1000 fake friends." And I, being an extrovert and do have more than 1000 friends, was shocked to hear that! Seriously? You'd rather have literally no friends at all? What if your 1 or 2 friends died or moved or eventually be off your life?

So I stepped back, reflect, ponder, and come to this conclusion:

I'd rather have 1000 true friends, rather than 1-2 fake friends.

I'd rather be rich and kind, rather than be poor and wicked.

I'd rather have an expensive clothes with quality that last a long time, rather than a cheap clothing that is so broken that it tore the first time I wash it.

I'd rather have good times with someone else, rather than have bad times with you.

I'd rather have a 9 with my own effort, rather than a 6 with cheating.

You get my point.

Change the way you think. It is possible to achieve better things and state of mind without compromising your values and integrity. It is attainable.

Well, my high school friend is right. It's better to get the BEST THINGS in THE RIGHT WAY, rather than getting LESSER THINGS in the WRONG WAY!

Does The End Justify The Means?

Finally I know the answer of that question.

Does the end justify the means? No matter how noble is the end?

The answer is... NO.

Ask yourselves this:
1. Would you sell marijuana and cocaine (which you know will damage people's lives) to feed your family?
2. Would you prostitute yourself, so you can feed your children?
3. Would you accept a contract to be a killer, so you can buy a medicine to cure your parent?
4. Would you fund a terrorist to be able to provide housing to your loved ones?

I say no. Why? Because there should be another way to feed your family, your children, cure your parent, and provide housing to your loved ones. You can find different alternatives. You can work in a more honest way. You can work as a janitor, debt collector, salesman, warehouse guy, or any decent jobs that you hate but it's legal and not destroying lives!

Robin Hood sounds like a novel idea. Steal from the rich to feed the poor. But seriously, why would you do that? The rich work hard themselves. If the rich does steal from the poor, then report them to the authority! But you don't steal back. Don't do eye for eye. In reality, there are so many rich people that are rich because they work hard and they deserve to enjoy the fruit of their labor. Being rich (the right way) is not wicked.

Basically, end justify means is just simply mean a good outcome excuses any wrong committed to attain it. But wrong is wrong. Wrong is not right. If how you get your happiness is by doing the wrong thing, it's not true happiness. It's fake happiness and it's not really a happiness to begin with.

And is there something to justify the end?

Never sacrifice your moral. Never question your integrity. If it's a wrong thing to do, don't do it. No matter how noble is the intention. It's still wrong.

Keep doing the right thing.