Hari ini gue diundang untuk menghadiri acara makan siang prestigius yang diadakan oleh perusahaan di tempat gue bekerja. Gak semua orang diundang. Hanya untuk beberapa saja yang lolos seleksi. Kriterianya ditetapkan oleh para boss besar, dan gue merasa beruntung sekali bisa terpilih untuk menghadirinya. Seneng banget deh!
Mereka mengadakannya di restoran Beaches. Gue dulu udah pernah ke restoran ini sekali (beberapa tahun lalu). Jadi gue agak lupa2x ingat rute perjalanannya ke sana. Karena kurang PD (percaya diri) kalo nyetir sendiri ke sana, jadilah gue sepakat sama salah satu rekan kerja gue yang mumpung sekantor untuk pergi bareng2x ke sana. Istilah kerennya: nebeng, yang merupakan salah satu bakat spesialku sejak dini, hehehe.
Gue udah janjian sama si A (kita sebut saja doi A untuk cerita ini) kalo gue akan ketemu dia di kantor jam sebelas seperempat, karena acara makan siang ini diadakan tepat jam dua belas. Karena hari ini gue dijadwalkan libur (hore!), berarti gue akan mampir ke kantor dulu supaya kita bisa pergi bareng.
Nah, hari yang dinanti2kan tiba, yaitu hari ini. Gue udah tau kalo gue mesti nyampe kantor jam sebelas seperempat. Gue bangun pagi sperti biasa (gak super pagi banget lah, kan libur, jadi bisa tidur agak lamaan sedikit). Habis bangun pagi, ya berarti acara bebas sebelum jam yang sudah ditetapkan. Asik! Bisa main game, bisa ngeblog, nonton tipi, pokoknya haleluya dech! Biasanya tiap hari kan ngantor dari pagi sampe sore, pulang masak buat makan malam, terus acara main gamenya kan abis makan malam.
Saking asiknya gue menikmati acara bebas di pagi hari sebelum ketemuan sama si A, gue sampe nggak inget waktu. Gue melihat jam di dinding, tapi nggak kepikir kalo gue kan mesti siap2x pake make up, baju, tata rambut, dan segalanya sebelum jam sebelas. Pas gue ngeliat jam lagi, waktu udah menunjukkan jam sebelas seperempat. Nggak tau kenapa gue mikir pada jam itu lah gue harus stop acara bebas pagi dan mulai siap2x. Salah besar!!! Mestinya gue siap2x jauh sebelum jam sebelas seperempat, karena si A kan udah nungguin gue!! Haleluya jadi halelupa!!!
Gue langsung panik kalang kabut. Hal pertama yang gue lakukan adalah kirim text ke si A minta maaf bahwa gue akan telat. Mungkin si A punya pikiran yang sama, jadinya jam sebelas lewat dua enam doi telpon gue. Gue bilang,"A, sorry banget nih gue nggak taruh perhatian sama waktu, elu pergi dulu aja deh ke restoran itu, gue nyusul belakangan, jadi kita langsung ketemu di sana ya?". Untunglah si A nggak marah. Dan untung pula restorannya nggak terlalu jauh2x amat sih. Dan nggak ada acara macet soalnya kan bukan jam pulang-pergi kerja.
Berikutnya, gue langsung buka google map untuk mencari tau rute untuk pergi ke restoran Beaches. Alamaak!!! Google map bukannya ngasih tau rute yang mesti gue tuju, tapi ini pake acara "you must intall this app" this and that. Walah! Gue udah nggak punya waktu, ini google macem2x segala minta gue melakukan hal yang akhirnya tidak gue lakukan deh. Soalnya gue kan musti hati2x, jangan download sembarangan, jangan click link yang macem2x, mana tau itu scam.
Gue tau waktu udah nggak banyak lagi, soalnya gue mesti ciao sekarang kalo mau tiba di restoran tepat waktu. Akhirnya setelah dandan serba kilat, gue cabut dari rumah sekitar jam setengah dua belas, dan ngebut kayak setan jalanan. Dan selagi gue nunggu di lampu merah, gue berpikir,"Time is my worst enemy = waktu adalah musuh terbesar gue."
Tapi satu detik kemudian, gue mikir lagi,"No, I am my worst enemy = gue adalah musuh terbesar gue!"
Coba kita telusuri pemikiran ini. Gue udah tau kalo gue mesti ketemu si A jam sebelas seperempat. Tapi apa yang gue lakukan? Keasikan main ini itu, ngeblog kanan kiri, baca artikel2x di fesbuk dan linkedin dan segudang artikel2 lain di web2x, yang membuat gue jadi ketayalan sama jadwal yang sudah ditetapkan. Waktu jalan terus. Kalo gue bisa mempersiapkan diri lebih baik, mestinya gue disiplin sama diri sendiri seperti menetapkan waktu dari awal untuk stop acara bebas jam sepuluh tiga puluh, supaya bisa punya waktu empat puluh lima menit untuk dandan dan siap2x dan tiba di kantor dan ketemu si A tepat waktu.
Waktu bukanlah musuh terbesarku. Akulah musuhku sendiri pada saat itu. Waktu mah jalan terus. 60 detik sekarang dengan 60 detik sepuluh tahun yang lalu adalah sama. Tetap 60 detik. Satu jam sekarang dengan satu jam di lima tahun mendatang juga sama. Tetap satu jam. Jadi ngapain nyalahin waktu?
Tau kan ada orang yang berpendapat : Time get the best of you. Maksudnya kita kalah dalam let's say kompetisi tertentu karena waktunya sudah habis. Time's up, katanya orang bule di sini. Tapi kalo dipikir2x, sebetulnya bukan waktunya yang habis, tapi kitanya yang kurang persiapan dan tidak mengorganisir kegiatan kita dengan baik.
Dari pengalaman ini, gue berjanji untuk lebih baik lagi. Yang sudah lewat ya sudah. Tapi gue belajar banyak dari kisah hari ini. Lain kali, kalo ada acara penting kayak gini, gue harus berjanji pada diri sendiri untuk menjadwal kegiatan2x yang akan gue lakukan sebelum hari H. Boleh main game tapi nggak boleh lupa untuk stop setidaknya satu jam sebelum acara.
Akhirnya gua tiba di restoran Beaches, tepatnya empat menit setelah jam dua belas. Jengkel banget deh sama diri sendiri, soalnya gue paling nggak suka telat. Pake acara nyasar pula. Tapi untung banget suami gue yang baik ngasih tau rute yang benar untuk pergi ke restoran ini. Jadi nganggu dia di kerjaannya, tapi mo gimana lagi? Aniwei, acaranya sendiri berjalan dengan lancar, dan gue pulang dengan perut penuh. Hehe.
Tapi beneran deh, gue bener2x mesti taruh perhatian pada waktu. Ada waktu untuk main, ada waktu untuk ngeblog, ada waktu untuk dandan, dan ada waktu untuk pergi dalam perjalanan menuju suatu tempat. Jadi gue harus memperhitungkan dari semula semua hal yang gue lakukan dalam waktu2 tertentu, supaya pengalaman ini nggak terulang lagi.
Supaya lain kali, bukannya menjadi musuh terbesar, tapi gue bisa jadi sahabat terbaik bagi diri gua sendiri! :)
Enjoy random stories, deep-thoughtful moments, reflection of the mind, and everything in between.
Thursday, October 26, 2017
Uplifting Quotes
Uplifting quotes are needed between now and then, even for someone that always positive and happy. We all need words to encourage us, telling us to keep moving on. When I have doubtful moments, I instantly think of these quotes to give me strength.
Nothing really last forever. So like everything else, this too will pass.
Whatever it is, just don't give up. Don't give up your dreams and hope. You might change your tactic and strategy, but never your goal. Never your dream.
Move on quick. Keep pushing to the next thing. Life is too precious for us to linger thinking bad things that we don't have any control of. Just breathe in, breathe out, and "next!".
Again, like quote#1, nothing last forever. So this too, is temporary. Setbacks are always temporary.
And in the end, it doesn't matter. When it's time for us to leave this world, we won't bring anything to afterlife. We'll leave everything behind. So just relax, calm down, and clear your mind. This is not the end. We'll figure out the solution, but we won't stuck with this problem forever. Sometimes we need to let that matter go. So we can move on to the next important thing that already waiting for our attention.
Nothing really last forever. So like everything else, this too will pass.
Whatever it is, just don't give up. Don't give up your dreams and hope. You might change your tactic and strategy, but never your goal. Never your dream.
Move on quick. Keep pushing to the next thing. Life is too precious for us to linger thinking bad things that we don't have any control of. Just breathe in, breathe out, and "next!".
Again, like quote#1, nothing last forever. So this too, is temporary. Setbacks are always temporary.
And in the end, it doesn't matter. When it's time for us to leave this world, we won't bring anything to afterlife. We'll leave everything behind. So just relax, calm down, and clear your mind. This is not the end. We'll figure out the solution, but we won't stuck with this problem forever. Sometimes we need to let that matter go. So we can move on to the next important thing that already waiting for our attention.
Sunday, October 22, 2017
And the survey says...
I was walking with my husband today at the mall. As we walked while eating our ice cream, my eyes caught an interesting corner office with the label Opinion in the window. There are nothing on the display beside that one word.
Next to the window, there are a glass door. There was an announcement of it. Before I could finish what was there, a gentleman came outside and unlocked the door. He turned the sign from "Close" to "Open". And then he said,"We're open."
We must have a questioning look on our face, because we couldn't figure out what kind of merchandise or service this place sell. So he explained it,"We are a market research company. If you do some survey, we'll pay you $5 dollar for your opinion."
Hm, interesting.
This place is inside the mall. Normally store sell stuff and we give out money for the exchange. But this? We get money if we give our opinion?
My husband and I looked at each other, and I know our curiosity beat us. As if begging us to explore more.
My husband asked him,"What kind of survey?"
He replied,"There are different kind of survey. For example, how old are you, mam?" he turned to me.
I said,"32." And in that split second I laugh and said,"Wait! No, I'm 39!!". This is one of a very funny moment for me, because not too long ago I just had a birthday, and I can't believe I said I was 32! I guess I'm stuck living in 2010 for a moment, hahaha!
He then provided me examples of what kind of survey I have in my age group.
Long story short, we did the surveys. We got 5 bucks (each). It was an intriguing experience. But I think it's great that these companies are doing market research to test the water. To see how the consumer react before (or after) they launch their next product or service.
Hm, maybe my "opinion" made it to the Family Feud survey? Who knows!
Next to the window, there are a glass door. There was an announcement of it. Before I could finish what was there, a gentleman came outside and unlocked the door. He turned the sign from "Close" to "Open". And then he said,"We're open."
We must have a questioning look on our face, because we couldn't figure out what kind of merchandise or service this place sell. So he explained it,"We are a market research company. If you do some survey, we'll pay you $5 dollar for your opinion."
Hm, interesting.
This place is inside the mall. Normally store sell stuff and we give out money for the exchange. But this? We get money if we give our opinion?
My husband and I looked at each other, and I know our curiosity beat us. As if begging us to explore more.
My husband asked him,"What kind of survey?"
He replied,"There are different kind of survey. For example, how old are you, mam?" he turned to me.
I said,"32." And in that split second I laugh and said,"Wait! No, I'm 39!!". This is one of a very funny moment for me, because not too long ago I just had a birthday, and I can't believe I said I was 32! I guess I'm stuck living in 2010 for a moment, hahaha!
He then provided me examples of what kind of survey I have in my age group.
Long story short, we did the surveys. We got 5 bucks (each). It was an intriguing experience. But I think it's great that these companies are doing market research to test the water. To see how the consumer react before (or after) they launch their next product or service.
Hm, maybe my "opinion" made it to the Family Feud survey? Who knows!
Monday, October 16, 2017
Futuring
When I was 12, I had a homework assignment from my teacher. She wanted us to think of what will I become when I reach the age of 35. What will I do? So, using my imagination, I envisioned my 35 year old self will be married, have 2 kids, and not working at all. My justification of not working? The kids. They will need a mother to grow up with, and I don't want to entrust their care in someone else's lap. I want to raise them, educate them, and spend all my time with them. I want to be there to watch them grow up, do their homework together, teaching all the important stuff about life.
Armed with this vision, I grow up to be a young lady with busy activities. When I was in high school, I challenged myself to not only to be the top ten of my class, but I also was active in my high school's drama club. I trained myself to not only master one thing, but two things at once. With time that has been given to me, I want to see if I can manage my activities effectively.
When I was 20, I was super busy. I attended my university classes and pushed myself to get an A in every single subject possible. I also was active my student body (senate), holding events like seminars, workshops, and outreach events, getting sponsorship from left and right to fund my events, creating special committees, and ensure each events went on successfully.
One of my best friend saw this pattern in me. Always going around somewhere. Always have something to do. No idle time. So he asked me why I push myself to do all these. I, naively said, "15 years from now I'll be 35. I'll be married and have 2 children. I also will be working (this is a bit different from my original vision, but that's okay. I guess when I was 20 I realized that my future family might need my income to help support life). So I need to train myself for time management while juggling with these activities. Might as well learn now rather than be overwhelmed later."
And I did it. I graduated from my university with honors (cum laude). I was proud of my achievement. Although I did not get summa cum laude or magna cum laude, but I thought it was good enough graduating with cum laude at least because on top of that I also busy doing something else. I had my activities with the student senate. And in the final year of my study, I also worked part-time (internship). Another thing that I accomplished: I got an A in my final thesis. This is from a professor that was infamously never given somebody an A!
One thing that I can learn from these experience, it taught me something. Because I already know that my time at the university is limited, I was able to do quality things and not doing stuff that not important. During the class session, I seriously study. During the students senate meeting, I hold the meeting effectively because I know this is the only time for me to do things. I charted a road map for me on how to finish all my classes in 3.5 years, because I don't want to be one of those students that attending classes "forever". College should be a 4 years degree (unless if you're in medical field).
One terms comes to mind: futuring. Futuring is a systematic process for thinking and planning about the future. Back then I didn't know that I was futuring. I want to always be prepared to what's next, that's why I "trained" myself to be ready for whatever may comes. I guess I should call myself a futurist. Futurists are people who actively view the present world as a window on possible future outcomes. They watch trends and try to envision what might happen.
In the corporate world, this is what they called a vision.
Now I am 38.
I am married. I don't have 2 kids. But I do have 2 important people to take care of: my husband and my mother. I am working, for the last 17 years of my life. The future is somewhat different from what I envisioned. And that's okay. Because the past got me prepared for what's next.
Right now, I am still futuring. I imagine what my life will be when I'm 50, 60, and beyond. I predict that I won't work forever (I hope!), therefore I'm getting serious in building my retirement funds. I also think that healthcare cost will keep rising, so to prevent expensive treatment in the future, I watch what I eat (and drink). I don't want to work all the time, pile all those money, to be ended up wasting fixing my health. I want to enjoy my life, and for that I need my health. No more bacon and french fries! More fruits and vegs! Goodbye sodium!
All of these futuring is so exciting! It helps us preparing our next chapter in life. The prep stage, it enhanced our skills. It taught us to be selective with our thoughts and activities. It helps us to make a right decision. "Is this helping us with our goal? or not?". If the answer is not, then you know what to do. It pushes us to continue learning things that we don't know before. Like the term RMD (Required Minimum Distribution) for retirees age 70 and above. Or the secluded vacation spot in Vanuatu.
Futuring change our perspective. Futuring could help change our lives to the better. If you haven't try futuring, then try it. Explore it. You might need it one day. At least you'll get new skills and a new way to see the world.
Sunday, October 08, 2017
22, 42 & 62
Last year, I wrote a blog titled What Advice Would You Give Your 21-Year-Old Self?. So now, a year later, my 21 yr old self would be 22. And I do have some insights to give to my 22-year-old self. But we can't turn back time. I can't go back to be 22. So instead of giving the advice to "her", I would pass the message to the older version of myself in the future. To my 42 year old self! Even to my 62 year old self!
1. Avoid death by small stuff
It's the small things that stresses life. I admit I'm guilty of this. I let small things bother me. I let small things ruin my day. If you already have a habit to get stressed easily, then it'll require a huge effort to change this behavior.
I learn from my wise husband that he doesn't let small things bother him. He is so peaceful. Yesterday we were driving in the road, and suddenly there's an ambulance making a left turn and cut immediately in front of us. My first reaction was to reach out to the horn, even though I wasn't the one who drove. But my husband prevented me and said,"Let it go. It's okay". I retorted back and said,"It's not okay, he should follow the rule, we almost got into an accident.". He calmed me down and said,"Just forget about it. We didn't get into an accident. And see? I even already forget about it."
The rest of the journey was pleasant. I let it go immediately. My younger version will keep hang on to it and let it dictate the rest of my days. But, this new habit, "let it go easily", it's actually works. I feel calmed and peaceful. What can I do anyway? The ambulance already way far ahead to the freeway. Plus the driver might be rushing trying to save another life by getting as fast as possible to get to the hospital.
Avoid death by small things. Don't make it your problem if it's not your problem. Like Elsa sang, "Let it go."
2. Keep saying no
Warren Buffet once said :
I ended up writing a separate blogpost for this. For further details, read it here.
3. Don't let your future controls your present.
Aka "Don't Worry, Be Happy". As Bobby McFerrin sang in that song, we shouldn't be worry for things that we can't control. Future for example. There's only few things that we can control, but we cannot possibly oversee every aspect.
I'm not saying that you should not planning your future. You do have to take necessary steps to build up your dream lives. You should have a goal and realistic plans to achieve it. I'm just saying that you should not be worry about it. If you let your future thoughts clouding your present too much, you won't have a present to enjoy.
I myself was guilty (again!). Sometimes I overanalyze my future. I obsessed with perfecting it, that I forget to enjoy the present. I spent hours planning this and that, and sometimes it ended up not happening anyway.
It's like a lottery wish. You ever heard that question,"What would you do if you win a million dollar?" You start saying, oh I'm going to pay this debt and that debt. I would buy this and that. I would help this person and that person. I'm going to travel all around the world. I would save half and invest half. I would do bla bla bla and the list go on and on and on. Just like Samir and Michael Bolton from Office Space did.
Well, it was a nice wish, but will it come true? That's why the question is in the "IF" format, and not "WHEN".
Don't be too consumed with all futuristic things. Set a goal, create a systemic plan, and do it. Just do it, but don't worry about it. Make adjustment to your plan if necessary and keep moving on. Don't get distracted with flashy little things here and there. And in the same time, enjoy the present. Enjoy the ride.
If your goal is so high above there that it seems you're in the bottom of the well, then be flexible. Don't set up goal so unrealistic that you ruin your present. That's why don't let your future control your present. You control your fate, not the other way around. Just don't worry, be happy.
Those are 3 things that I will tell my 42 & 62 year old self to do. Better yet, why wait that long. Just do it now. Let it go, no, and don't worry! :)
1. Avoid death by small stuff
It's the small things that stresses life. I admit I'm guilty of this. I let small things bother me. I let small things ruin my day. If you already have a habit to get stressed easily, then it'll require a huge effort to change this behavior.
I learn from my wise husband that he doesn't let small things bother him. He is so peaceful. Yesterday we were driving in the road, and suddenly there's an ambulance making a left turn and cut immediately in front of us. My first reaction was to reach out to the horn, even though I wasn't the one who drove. But my husband prevented me and said,"Let it go. It's okay". I retorted back and said,"It's not okay, he should follow the rule, we almost got into an accident.". He calmed me down and said,"Just forget about it. We didn't get into an accident. And see? I even already forget about it."
The rest of the journey was pleasant. I let it go immediately. My younger version will keep hang on to it and let it dictate the rest of my days. But, this new habit, "let it go easily", it's actually works. I feel calmed and peaceful. What can I do anyway? The ambulance already way far ahead to the freeway. Plus the driver might be rushing trying to save another life by getting as fast as possible to get to the hospital.
Avoid death by small things. Don't make it your problem if it's not your problem. Like Elsa sang, "Let it go."
2. Keep saying no
Warren Buffet once said :
I ended up writing a separate blogpost for this. For further details, read it here.
3. Don't let your future controls your present.
Aka "Don't Worry, Be Happy". As Bobby McFerrin sang in that song, we shouldn't be worry for things that we can't control. Future for example. There's only few things that we can control, but we cannot possibly oversee every aspect.
I'm not saying that you should not planning your future. You do have to take necessary steps to build up your dream lives. You should have a goal and realistic plans to achieve it. I'm just saying that you should not be worry about it. If you let your future thoughts clouding your present too much, you won't have a present to enjoy.
I myself was guilty (again!). Sometimes I overanalyze my future. I obsessed with perfecting it, that I forget to enjoy the present. I spent hours planning this and that, and sometimes it ended up not happening anyway.
It's like a lottery wish. You ever heard that question,"What would you do if you win a million dollar?" You start saying, oh I'm going to pay this debt and that debt. I would buy this and that. I would help this person and that person. I'm going to travel all around the world. I would save half and invest half. I would do bla bla bla and the list go on and on and on. Just like Samir and Michael Bolton from Office Space did.
Well, it was a nice wish, but will it come true? That's why the question is in the "IF" format, and not "WHEN".
Don't be too consumed with all futuristic things. Set a goal, create a systemic plan, and do it. Just do it, but don't worry about it. Make adjustment to your plan if necessary and keep moving on. Don't get distracted with flashy little things here and there. And in the same time, enjoy the present. Enjoy the ride.
If your goal is so high above there that it seems you're in the bottom of the well, then be flexible. Don't set up goal so unrealistic that you ruin your present. That's why don't let your future control your present. You control your fate, not the other way around. Just don't worry, be happy.
Those are 3 things that I will tell my 42 & 62 year old self to do. Better yet, why wait that long. Just do it now. Let it go, no, and don't worry! :)
Keep Saying No
Warren Buffet once said :
I've been implementing this principle for a long time. But sometimes I'm not consistent. Sometimes I said yes, when I should have said no. And then there is regret. Regret why I was so weak and succumb to temptation.
So now I held my head high and be confident with my choice. If I already have a commitment to certain goal or certain someone, I won't say yes too easily because that could distract me from completing my tasks.
There are 2 things that we should say no to:
a. Time Robbery
We only have limited hours to do what we need to do and what we want to do. We have obligation and responsibility that requires us time and energy to finish it. If we keep allowing other people to interrupt our already limited time, then how can we be closer to completion? Even if it was for a good intention, we should discipline ourselves and say no to extra things that doesn't help us get faster to our destinations.
I had my own case of time robbery. Few years ago I worked in a very highly operating team. We were very solid and work hard together. I could easily went into overtime because I have many projects and tasks to complete. We were close to each other, so when someone suggested we have a team outing, I unwittingly said yes.
At that time I already have a family : my husband and my mom. Sometimes I feel guilty when I have to work from home. Not only I bring my job home, I still working from home, while I should have spend more time with them. I already have 40 hours a week away from them, and now, I even taxing their time with me because I misplaced my priorities.
The team outing has been arranged and it happens on the same day of my husband's birthday. I told him this only takes 2 hours. Just 2 hours. Then I'm yours for the rest of the day. He was very understanding and wish me to have fun with my teammates. So here I go, with all of my coworkers, went to see a movie in Cinetopia, our favorite movie theater. While I watched the movie, something is nagging at me. I felt uneasy. I thought,"I should have spend the time with my husband and my mom, celebrating his birthday, making his day special! Instead, what am I doing here?"
Don't get me wrong. It is important to have a good relationship with your teammates. After all, they're the ones that support you and they are critical for your success at your job. But, after the clocking hours, it is your family time. It is your personal time. Your family is important too, and actually it's more important than your job. Why? Because they're the ones who pick up the pieces when your job say goodbye to you. When your job no longer need you, they're the ones who will be beside you when you're hunting another jobs. Jobs to support your family.
From that moment, I vow to not overmix my priorities. I limit my time to my work, because I need to set aside my time with my family, ... and with myself! I won't let anyone rob my time anymore. I won't let anyone dictate what should I do with my day, my hour, even my minute. I don't want to live with regret because I didn't spend time with the ones who matter the most.
Don't let time robber steal your precious time. You can't get it back.
b. Draining Environment
There are certain people in our lives that continues being a drama queen, drama king, blow up small things to big things, and draining our energy. They are everywhere. They constantly seeking our attention, begging our sympathy, or simply undermining us so they can feel better about themselves. This is what the experts labeled as "toxic people".
There's only one thing that we should do to toxic people. Keep your boundaries. Say no. You don't have enough time already with your life, why should you spare another moment to let them crowding your plates? I'm not being mean, but seriously, if these same people keep hindering you away from your happiness and your goals, then why?
Disconnect. Cut it loose. Just like a bad investment, you have to know when to get out.
I'm not saying that you have to completely ignore him/her and gave them a silent treatment. I'm just saying no to that draining behavior. You can still have a relationship with them, but the minute they start complaining, get out. Excuse yourself. "I'm sorry, I have to go." Don't give them the reason why. Explaining doesn't make things better. They won't understand. If they truly a good friend, they won't hold grudge to you. Beside, you do have other important priorities to do, right?
Limit your exposure to a draining environment. Surround yourself with uplifting environment. With people who truly loves you, care about you, and support you no matter what. Choose your environment wisely.
Conclusion:
Keep saying no is a positive attitude. If you keep saying no to the wrong things, eventually you'll say yes to the right thing. It'll make your "YES" priceless.
I've been implementing this principle for a long time. But sometimes I'm not consistent. Sometimes I said yes, when I should have said no. And then there is regret. Regret why I was so weak and succumb to temptation.
So now I held my head high and be confident with my choice. If I already have a commitment to certain goal or certain someone, I won't say yes too easily because that could distract me from completing my tasks.
There are 2 things that we should say no to:
a. Time Robbery
We only have limited hours to do what we need to do and what we want to do. We have obligation and responsibility that requires us time and energy to finish it. If we keep allowing other people to interrupt our already limited time, then how can we be closer to completion? Even if it was for a good intention, we should discipline ourselves and say no to extra things that doesn't help us get faster to our destinations.
I had my own case of time robbery. Few years ago I worked in a very highly operating team. We were very solid and work hard together. I could easily went into overtime because I have many projects and tasks to complete. We were close to each other, so when someone suggested we have a team outing, I unwittingly said yes.
At that time I already have a family : my husband and my mom. Sometimes I feel guilty when I have to work from home. Not only I bring my job home, I still working from home, while I should have spend more time with them. I already have 40 hours a week away from them, and now, I even taxing their time with me because I misplaced my priorities.
The team outing has been arranged and it happens on the same day of my husband's birthday. I told him this only takes 2 hours. Just 2 hours. Then I'm yours for the rest of the day. He was very understanding and wish me to have fun with my teammates. So here I go, with all of my coworkers, went to see a movie in Cinetopia, our favorite movie theater. While I watched the movie, something is nagging at me. I felt uneasy. I thought,"I should have spend the time with my husband and my mom, celebrating his birthday, making his day special! Instead, what am I doing here?"
Don't get me wrong. It is important to have a good relationship with your teammates. After all, they're the ones that support you and they are critical for your success at your job. But, after the clocking hours, it is your family time. It is your personal time. Your family is important too, and actually it's more important than your job. Why? Because they're the ones who pick up the pieces when your job say goodbye to you. When your job no longer need you, they're the ones who will be beside you when you're hunting another jobs. Jobs to support your family.
From that moment, I vow to not overmix my priorities. I limit my time to my work, because I need to set aside my time with my family, ... and with myself! I won't let anyone rob my time anymore. I won't let anyone dictate what should I do with my day, my hour, even my minute. I don't want to live with regret because I didn't spend time with the ones who matter the most.
Don't let time robber steal your precious time. You can't get it back.
b. Draining Environment
There are certain people in our lives that continues being a drama queen, drama king, blow up small things to big things, and draining our energy. They are everywhere. They constantly seeking our attention, begging our sympathy, or simply undermining us so they can feel better about themselves. This is what the experts labeled as "toxic people".
There's only one thing that we should do to toxic people. Keep your boundaries. Say no. You don't have enough time already with your life, why should you spare another moment to let them crowding your plates? I'm not being mean, but seriously, if these same people keep hindering you away from your happiness and your goals, then why?
Disconnect. Cut it loose. Just like a bad investment, you have to know when to get out.
I'm not saying that you have to completely ignore him/her and gave them a silent treatment. I'm just saying no to that draining behavior. You can still have a relationship with them, but the minute they start complaining, get out. Excuse yourself. "I'm sorry, I have to go." Don't give them the reason why. Explaining doesn't make things better. They won't understand. If they truly a good friend, they won't hold grudge to you. Beside, you do have other important priorities to do, right?
Limit your exposure to a draining environment. Surround yourself with uplifting environment. With people who truly loves you, care about you, and support you no matter what. Choose your environment wisely.
Conclusion:
Keep saying no is a positive attitude. If you keep saying no to the wrong things, eventually you'll say yes to the right thing. It'll make your "YES" priceless.
Saturday, September 23, 2017
Resep Awet Muda
1. Banyak senyum
Orang yang banyak senyum biasanya hidup lebih hepi. Percaya atau tidak, senyum itu adalah obat untuk mengurangi stress. Kita bisa lebih 'nrimo' atas keadaan yang terjadi pada diri kita, dan bahkan bisa membangun tekad untuk menghadapi masalah yang perlu dipecahkan. Senyum juga membuat kepribadian kita tampak lebih menarik
2. Sering bahagia
Sering-seringlah merasa bahagia. Bahagia itu bukan kondisi, tapi sebetulnya adalah perasaan. Nggak berarti kita harus ketawa terus. Tapi maksudnya adalah supaya kita merasa tercukupi dan puas dengan keadaan kita yang sekarang ini. Istilah kerennya, gratitude. Merasa bersyukur atas hal-hal positif yang terjadi dalam diri kita, akan membuat kita tetap tampil awet muda.
3. Jaga makan
Tambah usia berarti tambah risiko untuk kena penyakit seperti darah tinggi, kolesterol, atau diabetes. Tambah usia berarti kita harus kontrol jenis makanan, supaya kita bisa mencegah penyakit-penyakit yang nantinya bisa membunuh kita. Jauhi makanan berlemak, goreng-gorengan, dan soda. Konsumsi anti-oksidan, misalnya blueberry, brokoli, dan tomat. Banyak makan makanan berserat untuk menjaga kesehatan pencernaan kita.
4. Hidup sesimpel mungkin
Hidup sederhana bukan berarti mengasingkan teknologi. Justru teknologi akan mempermudah hidup kita dengan hal-hal yang praktis. Contohnya mencuci pakaian. Apakah anda lebih memilih untuk pergi ke sungai terdekat sambil membawa papan bilas dan menghabiskan waktu berjam-jam untuk nyuci pakaian di sana? Atau cukup sisihkan waktu 20 menit untuk mencuci baju menggunakan mesin cuci? Gunakan teknologi untuk membuat hidup anda semudah mungkin, supaya anda punya banyak waktu untuk melakukan hal-hal yang menyenangkan dengan keluarga!
5. Berpikir positif
Orang yang berpikir positif selalu tampak lebih muda dari usianya. Mereka menjauhi stress yang tidak perlu dan tidak menambah kerutan di mata mereka. Pikiran positif punya dampak sepuluh kali lebih hebat daripada pikiran negatif. Sering-seringlah membaca artikel-artikel pembangunan diri (self-help) supaya anda terus mengasah pikiran anda ke jalur yang positif.
6. Cukup tidur
Pada saat kita tidur, otak menjadi rileks dan melepaskan toksin-toksin ke jalur pembuangan yang tepat. Kita "memberi makan" sel-sel otak kita dalam tidur. Kadar glukosa dan fungsi endokrin dipertahankan dalam level yang semestinya dan ini mencegah kita untuk rawan penyakit seperti diabetes, hipertensi, dan obesitas. Tidur 8 jam sehari adalah syarat mutlak untuk selalu awet muda.
7. Stimulasi otak
Otak kita ini terus berkembang dari hari ke hari. Orang yang terus menerus menstimulasi kehidupannya melalui kegiatan asah otak, seperti hobi, pekerjaan, dan pelajaran biasanya akan mengurangi kecenderungan terkena penyakit Alzheimer sebesar 35-40%. Game itu bagus untuk tetap jadi awet muda!
Sunday, September 17, 2017
The Balloon Story
Once upon a time, there was a balloon seller selling balloons. Sometimes there are a lot of children crowding him, buying his balloon one by one. Sometimes nobody buys his balloon for a period of time. In this slow time, he release one balloon to the sky, to attract children to buy his balloons. When that happen, the children will crowd him again, buying his balloons to make them happy.
He does this every day.
One day, as he pumps the helium to his balloons, he felt a tug on his right side jacket. Apparently there was a little boy, trying to grab his attention.
"Yes kid, how can I help you?" asked the balloon seller.
"If you let go the black balloon, will it fly?" asked the boy.
The balloon seller look wisely at the child. And then he smiles. "Yes kid, the black balloon will fly. You see, it's not the color of the balloon, but the content inside that will make it fly to the sky".
***
It's our character inside that make us who we are.
Wednesday, September 13, 2017
Karma
If you plant an apple tree, you'll harvest apples.
If you plant a banana tree, you'll get bananas.
If you plant corn seed, you'll definitely will have corns.
You reap what you sow.
You will eventually have to face up to the consequences of your actions.
So...
If you plant kindness, you'll get kindness in return.
If you become evil and do wicked things, well... there will be karma.
Karma is principle of cause and effect where intent and actions of an individual (cause) influence the future of that individual (effect).
Do good deeds. Not because you're afraid of the consequences. But because it's the right thing to do. Karma has a funny thing to show that you'll be "rewarded" of your good deeds, whether you realize it or not.
May you have a good day today!
Limited Resources
Not everything is unlimited.
There are few things that are unlimited. Time, for example. Time itself as a concept is unlimited. There's always going to be time in the future. But our time, is limited. One day each of us going to be 'expired', just like milk. When and where, we don't know. But one thing for sure, our time is definitely not unlimited.
Everyone has 24 hours in a day. If we break down our day, that could be :
* 8 hours sleeping
* 8 hours working (or in school, if you're a student)
* 8 hours non-sleeping nor working/schooling = errands, homework, chores, fun, family, relax, etc.
Knowing that our day is limited, we need to prioritize things we do based on the importance. Make a list. The quicker you finished your tasks, the sooner you have free time to do whatever you want.
You also need to put a strategy into this. Are there things that you can do in the same time? Multi tasking is not really a bad thing if you can manage to finish 2-3 things at once. For instance, I'm preparing today's lunch. I like to eat noodle, so today I plan to eat my homemade peanut noodle. But in doing this, I will also cook my balsamic noodles to prep for my lunch for the next 2 days in the office. By preparing the noodles at the same time, the result is I'm making 3 meals at once. Save my time and energy!
Another resources that also is limited is energy. Again, the energy itself is unlimited. But our energy, is definitely limited. If it's not, then why we need coffee everyday? Some of my friends drinking energy drinks to keep them energized. This is another proof that our energy is a limited resources.
Since I'm not consuming coffee or energy drink, I must conserve my energy. If I know I'm going to have a long day in the office, let's say working 9 hours that day, I behave in a way that my energy is not all released at the same time. Keep the energy and replenish by snacks and lunch during the break time.
One tips that I do, is to control my excitement level. Everyone that knows me in the past can tell that I'm an excitable person. I rejoice in small things and get happy easily. But this could lead to my downfall too, having no energy left by the end of the day because I already exhaust it. So I learn to control my "outburst". Don't be too excited, but instead be calm and control my feelings, because I still have "a long way to go".
By understanding this limited resources concept, we gain knowledge that there are times and place to do things we need to do, and things we want to do. We find balance between obligations and rewards. We focus on quality instead of quantity.
Our time and our energy are limited, so use it wisely.
Saturday, September 09, 2017
Good Habits
Today me and my husband went to our favorite restaurant, Pho Green Papaya. Just the two of us. A lunch date!
While enjoying our lunch (I have the Pho Seafood and Lloyd had the Lemongrass Chicken), we talked. We were reminiscing on the good times and the trial times. One time,the conversation turns into a future topic: retirement.
We evaluated where our finances takes us today, and we were so glad we started investing early. We happy that we begun our retirement funds journey long time ago. We both agreed that it was a wise decision to set aside some of our paycheck and sacrifice the lifestyle we desired. Dave Ramsey once said,"Live like no one else so later on you can live like no one else." And it's true.
We remembered some of our friends that hesitant to invest their funds. Some of them said,"It's not the right timing. Market already over saturated. I'm waiting for the crash." Well... it's true that in 2008 and 2009 market was crushed down and recession hit. However, since 2009 until now, 2017, market has been up 45%! While he was waiting, he's missing 45% growth already in his would-be-portfolio. An opportunity missed!
Some other friends shared with us that they cannot afford to set aside even just 1% of their income. My husband wisely said,"Anybody should be able to decrease their lifestyle 1% lower. If not, they need to revisit their budget." I know it's hard already to live in today's economy, but it will be harder to grow your wealth if you don't start investing at all. Inflation will take 3 to 4% away in the future, so you should grow your money in a place that can give you at least 5% or higher.
I figure that we are not arrive in our today's destination in one night. There are daily habits that we developed over the course of 12 years of our marriage.
And these good habits are:
1. Budget.
Budget are not rocket science. Basically budget is knowing how much in and how much out. Income minus expenses equals net profit (or loss). You must command where your money goes. You must behave them. Otherwise, you'll be a slave to your money. Your money doesn't dictate you, you control them. And budget is the best tool to "conquer" your money.
2. Save.
Don't live 100% of your income. The good rule of thumb is 50/15/5. 50% spend for necessity. 15% for retirement (investment). 5% for short-term emergency savings. The rest 30%? It's yours. Do what you want. If you want to save more you can. If you want to have fun, you still can. But the bottom line is, you have to save. If you want to win with money, you have to start saving. Take that short-term sacrifices to win a long-term success!
3. Invest.
Invest some of your money. Experts say 15%. At least. You can always do more if you want. Don't wait until "the market is right". Don't wait until your condition is perfect. There is never a perfect right moment anyway, so why don't start now. Watch your money grow. And always consult with an expert, a financial adviser. Especially if this is a new area to you. Read investment blogs or books or magazines. Sharpen your knowledge. When you investing your money, your future self will thank you that he/she doesn't have to work as hard later in the golden years because they younger you already "plant that money tree".
The simple 3 good habits have paid off, and we're just only in the beginning! I can't wait to see how our future finances look like in the next 10, 20, 30 years!!!
While enjoying our lunch (I have the Pho Seafood and Lloyd had the Lemongrass Chicken), we talked. We were reminiscing on the good times and the trial times. One time,the conversation turns into a future topic: retirement.
We evaluated where our finances takes us today, and we were so glad we started investing early. We happy that we begun our retirement funds journey long time ago. We both agreed that it was a wise decision to set aside some of our paycheck and sacrifice the lifestyle we desired. Dave Ramsey once said,"Live like no one else so later on you can live like no one else." And it's true.
We remembered some of our friends that hesitant to invest their funds. Some of them said,"It's not the right timing. Market already over saturated. I'm waiting for the crash." Well... it's true that in 2008 and 2009 market was crushed down and recession hit. However, since 2009 until now, 2017, market has been up 45%! While he was waiting, he's missing 45% growth already in his would-be-portfolio. An opportunity missed!
Some other friends shared with us that they cannot afford to set aside even just 1% of their income. My husband wisely said,"Anybody should be able to decrease their lifestyle 1% lower. If not, they need to revisit their budget." I know it's hard already to live in today's economy, but it will be harder to grow your wealth if you don't start investing at all. Inflation will take 3 to 4% away in the future, so you should grow your money in a place that can give you at least 5% or higher.
I figure that we are not arrive in our today's destination in one night. There are daily habits that we developed over the course of 12 years of our marriage.
And these good habits are:
1. Budget.
Budget are not rocket science. Basically budget is knowing how much in and how much out. Income minus expenses equals net profit (or loss). You must command where your money goes. You must behave them. Otherwise, you'll be a slave to your money. Your money doesn't dictate you, you control them. And budget is the best tool to "conquer" your money.
2. Save.
Don't live 100% of your income. The good rule of thumb is 50/15/5. 50% spend for necessity. 15% for retirement (investment). 5% for short-term emergency savings. The rest 30%? It's yours. Do what you want. If you want to save more you can. If you want to have fun, you still can. But the bottom line is, you have to save. If you want to win with money, you have to start saving. Take that short-term sacrifices to win a long-term success!
3. Invest.
Invest some of your money. Experts say 15%. At least. You can always do more if you want. Don't wait until "the market is right". Don't wait until your condition is perfect. There is never a perfect right moment anyway, so why don't start now. Watch your money grow. And always consult with an expert, a financial adviser. Especially if this is a new area to you. Read investment blogs or books or magazines. Sharpen your knowledge. When you investing your money, your future self will thank you that he/she doesn't have to work as hard later in the golden years because they younger you already "plant that money tree".
The simple 3 good habits have paid off, and we're just only in the beginning! I can't wait to see how our future finances look like in the next 10, 20, 30 years!!!
Monday, September 04, 2017
Complacency
Few days ago, one of my friend gave me this quote:
And it's true.
Success often perceived as the final destination. But that's the danger of being successful. One can become complacent. One can just give in of the savory aspect of success. To just enjoy it and forget to push forward.
This is why I often view my successes as just "the past". It was a nice memories, but that's it, it's history. If we want to continually be successful, we need to keep the momentum and keep it going.
Success often leads to complacency. According to the dictionary, complacency is:
And it's true.
Success often perceived as the final destination. But that's the danger of being successful. One can become complacent. One can just give in of the savory aspect of success. To just enjoy it and forget to push forward.
This is why I often view my successes as just "the past". It was a nice memories, but that's it, it's history. If we want to continually be successful, we need to keep the momentum and keep it going.
Success often leads to complacency. According to the dictionary, complacency is:
com·pla·cen·cy
kəmˈplāsənsē/
noun
- a feeling of smug or uncritical satisfaction with oneself or one's achievements.
"the figures are better, but there are no grounds for complacency"
The danger of complacency:
1. We forget our goals.
2. We forget how important it is to keep running to the next finish line.
3. We are not aware of the next danger and succumb into the comfort zone.
4. We reduce our focus and take things for granted.
5. We're not going to arrive at the next success points on time, or maybe never at all.
1. We forget our goals.
2. We forget how important it is to keep running to the next finish line.
3. We are not aware of the next danger and succumb into the comfort zone.
4. We reduce our focus and take things for granted.
5. We're not going to arrive at the next success points on time, or maybe never at all.
It is okay to celebrate success. A victory needs to be savored. But don't stay there. Once the party is over, continue to focus on your work and reach out to the next milestones. Keep pushing forward!
Be successful, and don't be complacent.
Sunday, August 27, 2017
A Place to Sleep and I Eat Everyday
Some nights I cannot sleep.
Call it insomnia, stress, or over worry, but my brain keep thinking and thinking and thinking when it's time to go to sleep. I have been having this condition for years. I know sleep is very important, so I ask my husband who is an expert in sleep peacefully like a baby at night.
I asked him,"With everything in life that was thrown at you, how can you still be able to sleep soundly at night?"
His reply was simple.
"Well, I can sleep good at night because I know that I have a place to sleep and I eat everyday. Nothing else matters."
...
This is so deep! When he said that one liner, I stopped thinking for a minute and let it sink. A place to sleep, and eat everyday. Isn't that the common basic needs of human? That is so true! So why worry about anything else?
So from now on, I will practice this concept every night before I go to sleep. As long as I have a place to sleep at night, and I eat everyday, I should be happy and content. And being content will lead to night full of sleeps.
May we all sleep soundly like a baby, tonight, tomorrow, and the day after tomorrow!
Tuesday, August 22, 2017
World Peace (How)
In my previous blog post, World Peace (What), I describe what and why world peace is so important. I lay out the 5 stages of peace to get to world peace faster.
Now I'm going to share with you how we can achieve world peace together. It's actually easier than you think.
To accomplish a common goal, we have to unite and fight our common enemy. Who is our common enemy? Actually, it's not a who, but it's a what! Our common enemy is not each other, or other countries, ... the other people are our allies in this!
Our common enemy is the world's problem. We can list many of the world's problem, but I think this is the top 3:
1. Poverty/Social Gap
2. Climate change
3. Incurable diseases.
When people still think that other people is their enemy, they will try to eradicate other people. This way of thinking is dangerous. This could lead to tension and hostility. This could lead to war.
War is not the answer. Open diplomatic channel. Sit down and talk.
When we all can work together and find creative solutions to tackle the world's challenge, I believe eventually we will achieve world peace 100%. I believe one day we will have world peace!
If you want world peace faster, share this article around. May peace be with you.
World Peace (What)
What do we all want?
I think we want the same thing. World Peace. The world finally quits being so violent and for us to have peace wherever, whenever we are.
Why the world peace is so important? With peace, we can do the best without fear. Without intimidation. Without feeling have to be rushed or bullied into. Most of Miss Universe have been saying this since the pageant itself started in 1952! Come on people, it's 2017! It's time we promote World Peace!
I believe we can achieve world peace one day. Every countries, all of them, none exempted, will be at peace with one another. No more terrorism, no more war. Each countries can do what its best can do for the better of humanity.
To achieve this goal, we have to start with ourselves.
There are 5 stages of peace:
1. Self Peace
2. Family Peace
3. Society/Local Peace
4. Country Peace
5. World Peace
Next, how will we get there? I'll share the steps with you in my next blog post, World Peace (How).
Sunday, August 20, 2017
4 Savings Type You Should Have
We all know the importance of having a savings account. You can save for rainy day, unexpected occasions, etc.The good news is, these days we are not limited to just have one savings account. You can have multiple savings account.
By the way, this list doesn't include retirement planning, that is a whole different topic. Before doing number 2,3, or 4, you should establish the 1st savings fund, and set up retirement plan. After you all set with your retirement plans, then let's start the number 2,3, and 4.
Here's the top 4 type of savings that you should have:
1. Emergency Savings Fund
Experts say three to six months expenses should help to cover anything life throw at you. The bigger the better, so funding this right away will be a smart move. Prepare umbrella before it rains.This is your 'umbrella'.
2. College Savings Fund
Don't forget your children. Opening 529 plans will help them to have a better future. Give them their best chance to compete with other kids on the block. 10-20 years from now, their competition might be another graduates from different countries! Ensure they have at least a bachelor degree!
3. Birthday/Anniversary Savings Fund
To avoid feeling guilty on splurging money for your loved ones, start the birthday/anniversary savings fund today. This way you can avoid being in debt after getting that new diamond ring for her (or lavish watch for him). Having this savings also help to pay for that fancy dinner you've been dreaming for.
4. Vacation Savings Fund
This one it could be called a luxury savings. Why? Because technically you can still live without travel. But if you like travel and want to see the world, then you better start up the vacation savings fund. This way you don't feel in burden after your vacation done and seeing your credit card bill. Plan your vacation smartly and start putting money away! Bon Voyage!
And as bonus,I'm going to throw in one more savings type that you should have. I heard Christmas is coming in 4 months, so if you celebrate Christmas and all the gift-giving festivities for this holiday, you should open a ... Christmas Savings Fund!
If let's say you have 24 family members for gift giving, rather than buying all 24 gifts in November/December, you can break it down to just 2 gifts a month (starting January). This will help you to avoid having too much purchases in one month. Instead, you'll spread your money to 12 months period. Having a little bit purchases here and there helps. Now, I know it's not practical to buy the gifts right away and storage that in your closet. You could run out of place soon. So I recommend to just stash away the money first, let's say the dollar amount equals to 2 gifts a month, then you can go shopping spree on Black Friday!
Hope this article helps! Let's saving today and reap the rewards tomorrow!
Happy Savings! :)
Saturday, August 19, 2017
Why Titanic Sunk
A lot of people say that the reason why Titanic sunk was because of an iceberg. But the truth is, Titanic sunk not because of the iceberg. The iceberg was already there anyway.
The reason why the giant ship sunk, is because of... poor planning.
1. Life boats counts were less than the passengers, crews, and everyone aboard.
The ratio between the life boat and the people on board was way off. When Rose raised up this concern to one of the higher-ups, they just dismissed it. Have they paid attention to Rose's concern, they could make a game plan on how to solve this problem earlier.
2. The leadership team wasn't in unison.
One got too ambitious and want to make the headline by making the ship ran faster than what was agreed. The captain was influenced by the news reporter, and made a bad decision to speed up the boat. This greediness cost lives.
3. The crew was distracted.
Remember the scene after Jack and Rose made love in the carriage? They went out from the side door and were laughing out loud. The look-out crew on top of the ship got distracted with their laugh and kinda laughing at them. When he finally no longer distracted, it was too late to send the warning that could avoid the iceberg. Bam!
So... how we can prevent this from happening again? Easy.
1. Plan ahead.
2. If there was issue escalated to your attention, do something about it.
3. Stick to the plan and if you need to make any changes, analyze why.
4. Don't get distracted. Focus on your duties. Focus on what you're doing now.
These steps will help us in any situation, whatever your "ship" situation is. Don't blame the iceberg. Find the root cause and find resolution. Then solve your problems.
Have a good day, everyone!
Friday, August 18, 2017
Life is ...
What is life?
1. Life is a multiple choice.
The way we comb our hair, the flavor we choose our ice cream, the choices we make everyday, make up our life. Just be wise with our choices, they will follow us. Always choose to do the right thing. Always choose the best. Always do your best.
2. Life is an essay.
Every day we start with a new blank page. We can write whatever we want in it. Life is unlimited, you can be whatever you want to be.
3. Life is a book.
When you look at your past life, let's say in school, college, or your first work, you'll find your life is always evolving into something different in each stage. Just like a book filled with chapters, so does life. Each stage of life is unique and surprising. And when you "read" your life from 5, 10, 15, even 20+ years ago, you'll see that you are growing into better state each time. If you're life is not getting better, then change something.
4. Life is how you handle plan B.
This sentence is so deep, there's even no explanation needed for it. You can plan all you want, but life always will throw something at you, and that's called plan B. Chess is a good practice game on how you'd like to "plan" life.
5. Life is what you make it.
It is what it is. Life is what you live. How you think and do everyday is the sum of your life. Daily habits become the way of live. So cultivate a good habit, every single day.
Have a great life!
Thursday, August 17, 2017
The Purpose of Life
What is the purpose of life?
Is it money? Wealth? Fame? Success? Reaching the top ladder of the world?
It is not actually.
The purpose of life is... happiness.
No matter what you do in life, if you are not happy doing it, it's not worth it. Without happiness, everything is shallow. I found that when people are happy doing their work, they'll be more successful in their field. There's a deep connection and correlation between happiness and success.
Finding your inner happiness is as important as outer happiness. There are a lot of people that may not have everything their heart desire, but they are still happy because they are grateful for things (or people, like family and friends) that they already have.
It is a bit challenging to find happiness in this world today. With all the hecticness of life, busy rushing in and out doing this and that, with us constantly being pitted against each other in every measurement metrics out there, being truly happy is a rare state of mind. Sometime we thought we're happy if we have these stuff, or happy if we reach our goals and destinations, or happy if we have a certain person in our lives.
But who are we kidding?
Happiness is not the matter of owning bunch of stuff. Happiness is not when we reach certain stats. Happiness is not when we have finally connected with this person or that person.
True happiness is when you feel peace, calm, and serene even though it's chaotic out there. Happiness is when you can relax amidst the full schedule ahead. Happiness is when you share your happy moments with those people that you love and loves you back. Happiness is accepting who you really are and embracing your inner self. Happiness is being content.
Today, I wish you to be happy. Practice happiness everyday. It is the purpose of life.
Is it money? Wealth? Fame? Success? Reaching the top ladder of the world?
It is not actually.
The purpose of life is... happiness.
No matter what you do in life, if you are not happy doing it, it's not worth it. Without happiness, everything is shallow. I found that when people are happy doing their work, they'll be more successful in their field. There's a deep connection and correlation between happiness and success.
Finding your inner happiness is as important as outer happiness. There are a lot of people that may not have everything their heart desire, but they are still happy because they are grateful for things (or people, like family and friends) that they already have.
It is a bit challenging to find happiness in this world today. With all the hecticness of life, busy rushing in and out doing this and that, with us constantly being pitted against each other in every measurement metrics out there, being truly happy is a rare state of mind. Sometime we thought we're happy if we have these stuff, or happy if we reach our goals and destinations, or happy if we have a certain person in our lives.
But who are we kidding?
Happiness is not the matter of owning bunch of stuff. Happiness is not when we reach certain stats. Happiness is not when we have finally connected with this person or that person.
True happiness is when you feel peace, calm, and serene even though it's chaotic out there. Happiness is when you can relax amidst the full schedule ahead. Happiness is when you share your happy moments with those people that you love and loves you back. Happiness is accepting who you really are and embracing your inner self. Happiness is being content.
Today, I wish you to be happy. Practice happiness everyday. It is the purpose of life.
Wednesday, August 16, 2017
Start from Finish
Last week, I had the chance to spend time with a 9-yr old boy name Jayden. He likes puzzle, so I gave him a maze riddle on how to guide a prince find his princess.
I was amazed at how Jayden solved the puzzle!
Normally, we would start at the prince (start). But Jayden is unique, he started from the princess! From the finish line. And he traced her way back to her prince!
Although this is not the "right" way to solve the puzzle, but nonetheless, he was being creative and look at things from different spectrum. For him, to finish the riddle easier, he started from the end.
That was an eye opener moment for me. How many we adults struggle with our problems, because we just stuck at some point, and forget to see the finish line? Maybe we should change our approach and start solving our problem from the "finish" line! Who knows it makes the resolution easier to find?
I guess this is what Stephen Covey said in his book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People with "Begin with the End in Mind."
Way to go, Jayden!
I was amazed at how Jayden solved the puzzle!
Normally, we would start at the prince (start). But Jayden is unique, he started from the princess! From the finish line. And he traced her way back to her prince!
Although this is not the "right" way to solve the puzzle, but nonetheless, he was being creative and look at things from different spectrum. For him, to finish the riddle easier, he started from the end.
That was an eye opener moment for me. How many we adults struggle with our problems, because we just stuck at some point, and forget to see the finish line? Maybe we should change our approach and start solving our problem from the "finish" line! Who knows it makes the resolution easier to find?
I guess this is what Stephen Covey said in his book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People with "Begin with the End in Mind."
Way to go, Jayden!
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